Pat McAfee has a double-edged sword kind of job. When the offense is humming, he doesn’t move; he stands idly, watching the game go by. Yes, only when the offense struggles is McAfee called upon to perform his duty and showcase his skill.

So, Pat, be honest: Do you ever root for a few stalled drives? A few three-and-outs?

“No, not never, buddy,” the Colts punter said on CBS Sports Radio’s Tiki and Tierney. “The big thing this offseason, whenever we signed the monsters that are Andre Johnson and Frank Gore, and you have Andrew Luck playing quarterback and a ready-to-go offensive line, I think whenever all that started happening, I looked in the mirror and I said ‘Well, probably not a lot of punts this year, buddy,’ and I think that’s completely okay. If I go out and hold for extra points for Adam Vinatieri and kick off – if I kick off 145 times this year – all is good for me because I’m along for the ride. Winning is always better than losing. If you’re doing a lot of punting, you’re probably not winning much.”

While most NFL players spend the offseason working out, staying in shape and honing their craft, McAfee spent his doing standup comedy.


The 28-year-old punter put in his football work, of course, but he also hosted The Pat McAfee Show and spent a lot of time on stage. Tiki Barber, who has heard McAfee perform, called him “funny as hell.”

“Well I appreciate that greatly and I wish my mother would have the same thoughts as you. She thinks I’m a little ass,” McAfee said. “But no, I think I’m very lucky to have a fantastic job in the best sport in the entire world, which is American football. I’m just enjoying the ride, man. Just pointing out the things that I see, the life that I get to live. I’ve been very lucky. I was teammates with Peyton and Jeff Saturday and all these greats. And then the new regime. Adam Vinatieri is like a big brother tot me. I’m one of the luckiest guys in the world, so I enjoy the ride, enjoy my life, give my play-by-play and people seem to enjoy it, which is really cool for me. But like I said, my mother thinks I’m a little ass. So as soon as I get her to be a fan, I think we’ll be all good.”

Truth be told, McAfee has led a charmed NFL life. The former seventh-round pick has spent his entire career in Indianapolis, where he has played with Peyton Manning and now Andrew Luck.

“The thing about these guys, when you get in the locker room, everybody knows that you need each other to win,” said McAfee, who made the Pro Bowl last season. “They put their pants on the same. Everybody says everybody’s a human, but when you meet a superstar like Peyton and a superstar like Andrew, I think what they’ve both got going for them is just how humble they are to their teammates and the people they work with. It’s just been a lot of fun to work with them. We had one losing year there where we were 2-14. My rookie year we could have went completely undefeated and then the 2-14 year we could have went completely defeated, so I’ve seen it all. We’re just trying to keep on winning and keep having fun. But (when) the superstars are humble people – when you have that in your locker room – you’re in a good spot.”


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